A 9 AND A 6

The biggest casualty in today’s world is the breakdown of human relationships. It is sad and a tragedy to see the change in the way relationships are perceived and pursued.

Tim Keller sums it up well – “Ultimate reality is a community of persons who know and love one another. That is what the universe, God, history, and life is all about. If you favour money, power, and accomplishment over human relationships, you will dash yourself on the rocks of reality.”

Every relationship will start sweetly, and then may become sour. May be…will become…is more normal. If allowed, it becomes bitter. Then it leads to breakdown of every link and bridge that holds it in unity and harmony. Before long, we see the beautiful relationship being destroyed. This is where the skill of navigation helps us turn the sour relationship into a sweet one again. Love, Sacrifice and Patience form the bedrock of such a turn-around in any relationship.

However, it is good to know, that it takes two to tango. One sided effort wouldn’t help much. Before long the destructive elements would entrench themselves, and work their way towards destruction.

Troubles, disagreements and disappoints are to be expected in every relationship. They will be more common than we wish or desire in our relationships.

Navigating human relationships requires a knowledge of the perspective of the other person in the relationship. What appears as 9 to us, appears as 6 to the other person. From our view point we see a 9. From their view point, they see a 6. If one can get this perspective right, and understand it, then one can sail through almost any storm in our relationships. The rigid and inflexible pursuit of our view will invariably lead to conflict, beginning with opinions, and then to other things.

The LORD has a word for us and our relationships – “12 Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” – Matthew 7:12. This outlook helps solve the problem of perspective.

Let us work to building relationships, and not breaking and burning them down. It requires work, perspective, desire, determination and most importantly a united approach to solve it. It is hard work.